It was raining last night, so lovely. I could even breathe a fresh wet soil fragrance entering my window when i wake up. With Peter Pan whining, it just perfect. But it just reminds me to my conversation with Fa. A silence one. And i thought i will write it down in my blog rather than i have to search beyond her blog like " needle in the weed".
Fa :
Im finally al0ne at h0me. And the great thing is dat it's raining 0utside.. raining hard with str0ng winds.. I sto0d at the do0rway, with Eminem Blasting in the hi-fi. I sm0ke as i faced the 0utside w0rld, cl0sed ma eyes and feel the wind, the taste 0f rain... and ive never felt anym0re free.. It's beautiful. Its a pleasure t0 ma ears, the s0und 0f the p0urin dr0plets. I shut ma eyes, n0t wanting t0 0pen em ever. At least, f0r that very m0ment. F0r that 5 l0ng beautiful minutes, just sto0d dere, feeling everything c0mingsl0wly t0 me. And i hummed t0 maself. Im in an0ther w0rld, in an0ther time, standing amidst pe0ple like me, ma head spinning and ma b0dy swayin..and when it's all 0ver, i finally 0pened ma eyes. And what seemed like an eternity, i just sto0d,.. and thanked G0d....
sing with me.. sing f0r the year.. sing f0r the laughter, sing f0r the tears..sing with me, just f0r t0day.. maybe t0m0rr0w, the go0d L0rd will take me away........
Me :
I just forgot when was the last time that moment happened to me, Fa. I really miss that time. Being so soletairy watching the rain down, talking to my mind, nicotine flows in my blood stream. Jakarta denies rain so much.I thought if i could be there Fa, not talking to you, just sit with our sole mind pretending other did not exist, eye to eye and then watch the rain with a massive silent between.
No longer torn in two,
I'd take my own life before loosing you
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